Humility

"To be a Christian is to be an imitator of Jesus. In what can we imitate him if not in his humiliation? Nothing else can bring us near to him. We may adore him as omnipotent, fear him as just, love him with all our heart as good and merciful, but we can only imitate him as humble, submissive, poor, and despised. Let us not imagine we can do this by our own efforts. Everything in us is opposed to it; but we may rejoice that God is present within us.

O lovely Jesus! You suffered so many injuries and reproaches for my sake. Let me cherish and love them for your sake, and help me desire to share your life of humiliation."

-Francois Fenelon Talking With God


I was really convicted by this reading a couple days ago. Adoring, fearing, and loving Jesus are all good things. It should happen if you call yourself a Christian. I think I have stopped there sometimes, though, and it has not produced the fruit I would like in my life. It conjures up good feelings. It makes me feel good and fuzzy and in love with Jesus. Again, not bad things at all! But when you stop there and let go of the truth of His words that we will suffer if we follow Him we make an idol of the emotional byproduct of knowing Jesus. Instead of humbling myself, I stop when I get the fuzzies, and that isn't what He had in mind when He was suffering on our behalf.

So I try to humble myself. I fail. I try again. I fail. I keep "doing"  this until I realize that I'm still not getting it. Thinking I can humble myself with my own strength is pride hidden. The opposite of humility. So I just lower head. Pray for grace and the eyes of my Savior.